Here s Greg Here Comes Greg Again

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Hey, Greg, here'south how you tin tell the difference betwixt a mistake and brutal, cold-blooded murder

Just to be clear, Greg Norman, a error is what you made on the 12th hole at Augusta in 1996 when you dumped your ball into the water and watched it, and your Masters hopes, sink.

The murder and cutting up of a journalist critic of a Saudi prince past agents of that prince, the same prince who is now funding your multibillion-dollar bulldoze to gut world golf game and feast on the entrails, is non a mistake. Not to any normal mind.

Greg Norman and (inset) Jamal Khashoggi. Credit:Getty/AP

"Await, we have all made mistakes, and you just want to acquire from those mistakes and how yous tin correct them going forward," you said from the seclusion of a British country club on Wed when spruiking this new enterprise.

Learn? Correct? Movement on? Did y'all hear yourself?

Greg Norman at Augusta in 1996. Credit:Stephen Munday/Allsport

Since you seem to have left your moral compass on your private jet, hither's how you lot can tell the divergence between a error and barbarous, cold-blooded, state-sponsored murder:

To make good your mistake at Augusta, you probably adjusted your grip, stance, mindset, whatsoever, and never again hitting a ball quite similar you did that fateful day. You made a few other ratty swings that circular, and lost the tournament, but you went forrard.

Even if he tried, crown prince Mohammed bin Salman could not accommodate journalist Jamal Khashoggi back into an intact homo existence once more. Khashoggi will never again move forrard, non ane millimetre (though he might turn in his grave if he hears of your stunningly callous apologia).

"Allow's just stay focused on the golf," you lot say. "That'south what I'g going to do."

Sure. But it's kind of hard when MBS - as you and then affectionately telephone call him - and his golf buddies recently executed 81 men in a single solar day in their lawn. OK, yous've got to maintain law and order, but even for the Saudis, 81 is a bit over par, surely? Some other lilliputian flub, I suppose?

"I look forwards. I don't expect back. I don't look at the politics of things," y'all say. "I know the mission I have as CEO of LIV golf … I'm non going to become into the quagmire of whatever happens in someone else's world."

Greg Norman at the inaugural Formula 1 Miami Grand Prix. Credit:AP

Um, that someone else's world and its corpse-laden quagmire is your world now. You're taking their money and doing their bidding.

Information technology's non like there's a Swiss bank account or a Cayman Islands belongings visitor to obscure the trail. MBS'southward public investment fund fully owns LIV, which fully owns you lot. Yous're cleansing the bloodstains from that money. It's called sportswashing. The Saudis practically invented it.

Bill Clinton and Greg Norman play golf game together in Australia. Credit:Joe Marquette/AP

Merely yous don't do politics, of form. Oh, except that time when you didn't want to play golf with Bill Clinton in Australia because yous disagreed with his, um, politics, until George Bush, a politician, told you that yous should.

Still, it's different over at that place, right? Besides, anyone tin make a fault, no? A mere human rights oversight? A momentary burring of the bonesaw, a fiddling slip of the scimitar?

Well, no. A fault is what y'all made on the quaternary and last play-off hole at the British Open up in 1989 when you did not allow for adrenalin, belted a drive into fairway bunker 320 metres away and allow Mark Calcavecchia in for the win. Y'all managed to movement forrard from in that location.

Try moving forward as, for instance, a woman in Saudi arabia. Attempt as a gay person. Put yourself in the shoes of your gay friends. "I'm non sure whether I even take whatever gay friends, to be honest with you," y'all say. Well, knock u.s. over with a tee peg.

To be off-white, who hasn't accidentally incorporated systemised bigotry into their lives now and and then while playing tootsies with a hardline Islamic theocracy? It's a learning feel, a take chances to correct, a manner forward. Information technology all comes down to your opinion and your grip.

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But don't mind us. You've got a golf game circuit to organise, and as of this week, an actress $ii billion to tip into it, cheers to skillful old MBS, maker of the odd forgivable fault. Of class, that means waving wads of riyals in the faces of the world'south all-time golfers, who are already lining upward for their cut.

And if US and European tours fine or ban players equally mooted, you lot take the answer, the aforementioned reply as to every other question, the answer that atones for every mistake. If fines, yous'll pay them. If bans, you'll pay lawyers to make them go away.

At the Masters in 1987, Greg, you lot didn't brand a mistake as such. Rather, your little-known opponent Larry Mize holed a chip shot from 40 metres on a play-off pigsty to snatch certain victory from you.

You had the world's sympathy then. Australia put its arm around you. But in the decades since, the wreath of national favour has fallen from your head and the cloak of immunity slipped further and farther from your shoulders, leaving us to run into you for what is: a bloke who once played golf game quite well.

You're now the Groovy White Witchetty Chow, and what was the Mize mishap has retrospectively become, as a colleague wryly noted, ane of the great days in Australian sport.

Make no fault.

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Source: https://www.smh.com.au/sport/golf/hey-greg-here-s-how-you-can-tell-the-difference-between-a-mistake-and-brutal-cold-blooded-murder-20220512-p5akwd.html

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